Again, for mcee, Horatio Hornblower wee ficlets.

[perpetual_motion]

So, mcee has some sort of super power that makes me write wee ficlets for her at the drop of a hat. The girl has scary powers. Also, she's not overly fond of our dear Mr. Kennedy as an appropriate bedmate for Horatio Hornblower. She insists upon William bedding him.



"You think *what*?" Horatio is aghast, with his mouth hanging open and his eyes open wide. He stares at William as though the other man has let loose swears in church.

William, for his part, looks decidely unruffled. "I merely made an observation."

"Well, it is the *wrong* observation, I assure you."

"So you and Mr. Kennedy-"

"Are purely friends, Sir." Horatio flings back the covers and stands up, his shirt covering just enough to make him look utterly debauched with his very red lips and terribly tousled hair. He searches for his breeches.

"Where are you going?" William seems utterly unaffected by Horatio's sudden, frantic mood.

"Out. Away. To the air." Horatio can not find his breeches. He tries to remember where they might have been flung when they came into the room, but William's lips had been on his neck, and William's hands had been on his ribs, and the combination of the two makes for a distraction no man could understand unless they'd lived it.

"Oh, Horatio, be sensible." William steps out of bed with much less vigor than Horatio displayed, and he walks over to the bureau, where Horatio's breeches had landed earlier. "It was merely a question."

"You inquired-" Horatio cuts himself off with a snap of his teeth and yanks his breeches from William's hand.

"You are very close."

"It does not mean we've-" This time Horatio cuts off out of sheer politeness. You do not discuss certain things unless in the right moment, and this is certainly not that moment.

William laughs warmly and cups the back of Horatio's tousled head with one long-fingered hand. "I meant no disrespect Mr. Hornblower. I was merely searching out a bit of your history with Mr. Kennedy."

"My history with Mr. Kennedy is that of two sailors on a ship learning their trade. There are no insinuations or untold tales."

"You could have just said that in the first place and saved yourself the energy of searching for your breeches."

"You-" Horatio stalls himself again and throws his breeches on the floor with a sigh. "You enjoy bothering me more than is healthy, William."

"A bother am I?" William's tone is teasing. "Well, then, perhaps I should take my leave."

"Oh, stop." Horatio wraps his hand over William's wrist and gives him a tug towards the bed. "Let us sleep now, and no more silly questions."

"Only because you insist." William allows himself to be led back to the bed, and he pushes Horatio's hair off of his face as they lie nose-to-nose. "I suppose then that any comparison I make to Mr. Kennedy and certain creatures in encyclopedias will not be met with violence?"

Horatio's laugh is rich and warm, and William drinks it in as he closes his eyes.



And then _cee came along, and she *is* a fan of the lovely Mr. Kennedy, but as I was typing these up in mcee's comments section, I thought it best not to piss off the maiden of the house.



"I won." Archie is smug as he takes a long gulp of his drink and thumps his mug back on the table.

William groans and rolls his eyes. "So you've said. Many, many, *many* times."

"Still. I *won*." And Archie is smiling quite widely and giving Horatio a suggestive look.

Horatio rolls his eyes, much in the style of Bush, and shakes his head. "I don't care a bit who's won. Nothing will come of it."

Archie looks decidely upset. "But I've *won*."

"Congratulations. Shag a barmaid." William flags down a barmaid as he speaks and pulls her into his lap. She giggles and swats him lightly with his tray. "Tell me, fine miss, would you be so kind as to bestow our boy with a congraulatory kiss?" William gestures to Archie, who beams and sits up a little straighter.

"What's he won?" The barmaid slips out of William's arms and walks around the table to Archie. She bats her lashes at him and leans closer. "What have you won?"

"I've won-"

"Archie-" Horatio's tone holds warning.

Archie beams at him, then beams at the barmaid. "I've won the chance to kiss the prettiest girl here." He leans over and pecks the barmaid on the cheek. She blushes and swats him.

"You're terrible trouble, I can tell."

William and Horatio share a chuckle. "You have no idea," William informs her as she goes for fresh ale.

Archie raises his mug. "I still won."

Horatio and William groan in unison.