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perpetual_motionYeah, so, I finally watched "The Cooler" last night, and I adore it. Why the MPAA went into hysterics over the sex scenes I can not say. Were they a bit more graphic than most movies? Sure. But "The Passion" had 2-1/2 hours of violence and no one bitched about them needing to tone it down so that it wouldn't get slammed with NC-17. Fuckin' dicks at the MPAA need to realize that violence is not "safer" or "better" than sex.
End rant. Fic now.
Title: Had to Be a Lady
Author: Perpetual Motion
Fandom: The Cooler
Pairing: Bernie/Shelly
Rating: R [language]
Summary: It's not that he's mad at Bernie.
Disclaimer: They belong to who they belong to, and that's not me.
Author's Notes: You know, I wasn't even thinking slashy thoughts when I watched the movie last night. My brain needs a hobby that isn't 'find the gayness'.
Had to Be a Lady
By Perpetual Motion
It's not that he's mad at Bernie. Well, he is mad, but not because his luck has changed. For every Cooler, there are ten to take his place. You just have to know how to spot them. Shelly's always been able to spot them. Bernie took the place of a guy who decided he'd rather try a swan dive from the roof than to keep fucking with people's luck. Shelly wasn't to destroyed when the guy left. He'd been a whiner.
He wasn't mad at Bernie because his luck changed. He was mad at Bernie because it had to be a fucking woman who changed it. It made no sense. Shelly had hired to broad to keep Bernie around. Give a man a piece of tail to chase, and he'll be to occupied to notice that you'll still using him for your own gains. The bitch wasn't supposed to fall for him. And Bernie sure as fuck wasn't supposed to be lucky enough to get her to stick around even if she did. Bernie was a loser. A full-out, old-time, mythical proportions loser. Even if he got the girl, he wasn't supposed to keep her.
And even when he got the chance to keep her, he wasn't supposed to want to. Why would he want some rundown, beat-up cocktail whore when Shelly was there the whole time? Why would Bernie want some whore when he could have Shelly? Wasn't Shelly the one who'd taken care of him? Wasn't Shelly the one who made sure he got his daily bread and board? Wasn't Shelly the one who'd kept an eye on him all this time?
Dumb fuckin' luck had to be a lady.
End rant. Fic now.
Title: Had to Be a Lady
Author: Perpetual Motion
Fandom: The Cooler
Pairing: Bernie/Shelly
Rating: R [language]
Summary: It's not that he's mad at Bernie.
Disclaimer: They belong to who they belong to, and that's not me.
Author's Notes: You know, I wasn't even thinking slashy thoughts when I watched the movie last night. My brain needs a hobby that isn't 'find the gayness'.
Had to Be a Lady
By Perpetual Motion
It's not that he's mad at Bernie. Well, he is mad, but not because his luck has changed. For every Cooler, there are ten to take his place. You just have to know how to spot them. Shelly's always been able to spot them. Bernie took the place of a guy who decided he'd rather try a swan dive from the roof than to keep fucking with people's luck. Shelly wasn't to destroyed when the guy left. He'd been a whiner.
He wasn't mad at Bernie because his luck changed. He was mad at Bernie because it had to be a fucking woman who changed it. It made no sense. Shelly had hired to broad to keep Bernie around. Give a man a piece of tail to chase, and he'll be to occupied to notice that you'll still using him for your own gains. The bitch wasn't supposed to fall for him. And Bernie sure as fuck wasn't supposed to be lucky enough to get her to stick around even if she did. Bernie was a loser. A full-out, old-time, mythical proportions loser. Even if he got the girl, he wasn't supposed to keep her.
And even when he got the chance to keep her, he wasn't supposed to want to. Why would he want some rundown, beat-up cocktail whore when Shelly was there the whole time? Why would Bernie want some whore when he could have Shelly? Wasn't Shelly the one who'd taken care of him? Wasn't Shelly the one who made sure he got his daily bread and board? Wasn't Shelly the one who'd kept an eye on him all this time?
Dumb fuckin' luck had to be a lady.
